To find out if you have racist bones in your body, you must consult a professional who specializes in wypiopology. Oftentimes, other white people misdiagnose the disease after noticing that they share symptoms with the patient.

A skilled wypipologist will run you through a battery of tests that includes—but is not limited to—asking how you would feel if your offspring dated a black person, asking you to record how many times your relatives said the n-word at Thanksgiving or simply uttering the phrase “black lives matter” and asking, on a scale of one to ten, how badly you wanted to respond: “All lives matter.”